thirstyI've chosen the example of a big-name retailer to explore in-depth. I am not affiliated with it in any way, shape, or form, nor should this be considered a negative piece about their products, stores, or company. Please note that this article is simply to capture my reactions to their gift recommendations, in hopes that I can encourage readers to think outside the box and not hesitate when they want to give or learn about something or do something that's not quote-unquote "typical" for a certain gender. Just say no to gender bias.
Disclaimed and affirmed, let's go.
Target has a Christmas section (their name, not mine - I would have called it "Holidays" or "Gifts for the Holidays") at their website where they recommend gifts for different genders and ages. The initial breakdown offers:
Gifts for Her
Gifts for Him
Gifts for Girls
Gifts for Boys
Gifts for Teen Girls
Gifts for Teen Boys
Gifts for Baby
Gifts for Couples
In two separate windows, I looked over the options for Teen Girls and Teen Boys. First, I was asked to narrow it down by age, tweens or teens, then by personality.
The options for teen girls:
Miss Outdoorsy
Creative Thinker
Fashionista
Techie Girl
The options for teen boys:
Active Dude
Mr. Techie
Creative Kid
Video Gamer
I clicked into Miss Outdoorsy in one screen and Active Dude in the other. Each screen had 32 items pictured and listed. The boy was offered a baseball bat, a caster board, a portable basketball hoop, a basketball, and weight lifting equipment for the guy. None of these things were recommended to the girl, though she was offered lots of hiking items as well as golf clubs, a bicycle, a tennis racquet, and inline skates. For the boy, Lazer Tag Nerf and the Wii games called Punch Out! and Sports Resort were recommended; for the girl, there were pieces of jewelry, a journal, a tote bag, and the Wii game Active Life: Outdoor Challenge.
The Techie Girl and Mr. Techie page were more similar, each with a Wii console, TVs, and iPods, but many of the items on the girl page were pink, while the items on the boy page were mostly white or black. The recommended watch, camera, TV set, messenger bag, netbook, audio cube, and Nintendo DSi on the girl page were all pink. Even the iTunes gift card on the girl page was pink, while the iTunes gift card on the boy page was blue.
Creative Thinker (girl) and Creative Kid (boy) were the next pairing. When arranged by Best Sellers, the top row for girls had gray suede boots, the pink Nintendo DSi console, a blue sphere chair, a purple iPod Nano, and blue leggings, while the same arrangement for boys had a black iPod Touch, PlayStation 3, a black Nintendo DSi console, a blue iPod Nano, and a recharging mat. I was very happy to see an adjustable drawing and craft table on both pages. There were various pieces of clothing on the girl page, but no clothes for on the boy page. The girl was also recommended a hair dryer, a purse, and makeup.
They recommended five books for the creative boy:
Slayers: The Motion Picture Special Edition
The Dangerous Book for Boys
Instant Art History (From Cave Art to Pop Art) by Walter Robinson
The Giver by Lois Lowry
The Creative Edge (Exercises to Celebrate Your Creative Self) by Mary Todd Beam
The five books recommended for the creative girl:
Oh, wait. They didn't list any books for her. Not one book. Instead, there are DVDs of The Breakfast Club and Daria: The Movie, a Hello Kitty 3-piece body spray set, and a board game called Boys are Stupid.
Now, I've been trying to keep a pretty neutral tone while relaying these lists of items throughout this piece, but I have to say something right now: I doubt anyone could get away with making and marketing a game for boys to play called Girls Are Stupid. There's no need to have ANYTHING that puts down the opposite gender. I would not want to see a game recommended to kids (or anyone, for that matter) that put down a certain race or culture.
I have not played the Boys Are Stupid game (and I never will), so I cannot give it a proper review. I don't want to judge it unfairly, however, so let me share the summary from the website so you can make up your own mind: "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them-but first you need to collect the rocks. Do a wacky dare or answer an embarrassing truth to get 5 rocks and work your way home to win the game. The perfect slumber party game for girls of all ages. Also great for after a break-up or as an anti-Valentine's Day gift. For 2-4 People. Play Time of 30-60 Minutes."
I know that some of you are thinking, "It's a harmless game - get over it," but I ask you again to think of the scenario with a flip of genders: Would you think it was harmless if they were encouraging boys to throw rocks at girls, even if they were imaginary rocks in the context of this game? Do you really think it would be okay to market a game which encouraged violence towards young girls? I wasn't born under a rock (ha), so yes, I have heard the expression, "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them," and I've never, ever thought any part of that was funny or appropriate.
All right, final pages: Fashionista for girls and Video Gamer for boys. The names say it all: the girl page is filled with clothes, jewelry, and beauty products while the boy page is filled with games, game consoles, and controllers. Yes, some girls love getting all gussied up, but some love making touchdowns and blocking goals in the mud. Yes, some boys love playing video games, but so do lots of girls. Bethany and Robert might both turn out to be video game developers, or Bethany might pursue a job in sports medicine while Robert designs gowns and suits to be worn on the red carpet.
Back to the Fashionista and Video Gamer pages. There are two versions of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 for the guys, as well as Madden NFL 10, Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10, and that Punch Out! Wii game again. They also recommend Fantasy Freaks and Gaming Geeks: An Epic Quest for Reality Among Role Players, Online Gamers, and Other Dwellers of Imaginary Realms, a memoir-slash-travelogue-slash-pop-cultur
I can't stress it enough: Pre-teens, tweens, and teens are at different stages in development and in society. Let's not encourage them to grow up too fast. Let them be kids for as long as they can be, as they should be, and ease them into the adult world rather than throwing them in too early.
But that's another article for another time. For now, I wish you and yours the happiest of holidays - and hope that you encourage your kids to follow their hearts and realize their dreams, no matter what their genders or ages. If your teen son wants to wear a pink tie and skinny jeans, let him. If your teen daughter wants to take martial arts classes, find a reputable and affordable studio with an awesome sensei. If your kids show interest in something creative and active, support them. Help them learn more about all the different things they could do as hobbies or professions. Let them do what they love.
More to consider:
Just Say No to Gender Bias
More posts with the "gender bias" tag at Bildungsroman blog